Welcome to Blending a Family Ministry
Moe & Paige Becnel founded BAF out of their passion to see all Blended Families find God’s plan and God’s best for their lives. Knowing that traditional marriage counseling may not address the
complex issues exclusive to many Blended Families, BAF ministry focuses on the potential causes and effective solutions that lead to a successful, thriving family.
When Moe and Paige Becnel married in 1989, blending a family of five children, their hopes of a happy marriage and family quickly deteriorated into frequent and seemingly unending disagreements due to not knowing how to resolve the issues.
The many issues that are exclusive to blended families began to take a toll on the relationships, joy, peace, and stability they longed for within their home. The Becnels were suffocating in issues of children vs. stepchildren, the impact of divorce on children, new rules and whose rules, differing opinions, former spouses, and many others. They began to seek solutions to the blending issues in the Holy Bible, and found the root of the issues and the solutions there. As they began to follow God’s leading, the Spirit of God began an amazing transformation.
The same God who transformed the Becnel family desires and is waiting to do the same for your family.
The mission of Blending a Family Ministry is to be a healing place, to be a source of help for today's remarried families, to give guidance concerning all the issues that blended families face, to help remarried couples and their children to become the very best family that God intended, to dismiss the thought that blended families are second class families, and to see thousands of blended families flourish as they develop into the life-long, loving, peace-filled safe haven that God intended the home to be.
What is a Blended Family?
A Blended Family is a marriage in which one or both spouses become a stepparent (new parent), regardless of the age of the children.
- About 75% of those who divorce will remarry, most within two years.
- Psychologists say it takes four to eight years for a remarried family to “gel” and feel like a family.
- The divorce rate for remarriages with children is almost 65%, with most divorces occurring within the first four years—before the family has had time to blend.
- Over 50% of most Christian church congregations are in, or are related to, a blended family (i.e. couples, children, youth, grandparents, extended family, etc.)
Common blending issues
- The parent and stepparent typically do not treat children in the blended family equally.
- Many stepparents find it difficult to love their stepchildren.
- Remarried spouses often make their biological children a greater priority than their new spouse, which strains the new marriage relationship.
- Children of divorce often resist connecting to the new family.
- Discipline from a stepparent often results in opposition, frustration, and disrespect.
- Children of divorce usually have two homes, with different rules and methods of discipline.
- Extended families do not always accept the new spouse or the stepchildren, causing added hurt.
- Remarried spouses often have difficulty working with the other biological parent.
- Remarried spouses often find it difficult understanding or adapting to the new role as a stepparent.
Do any of these sound familiar?
Moe & Paige Becnel, authors of God Breathes on Blended Families – Second Edition, have faced all of these issues, and more. The book is a testimony of how applying God’s
truths to their lives brought healing and wholeness to the Becnel family.
In God Breathes on Blended Families - Second Edition, the Becnels present Twelve Fundamentals to build your family.
God is your loving Heavenly Father – and Helper
Regardless of how difficult, or how many issues your family may be facing, God is with you and is on your side! Consider these scriptures:
John 1: 12-13 states, “Yet to all who received Him (Jesus), to those who believed in His name, he gave the right to become children of God-- children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God."
(Though we all fall short of God’s glory, Jesus redeemed us back to our loving Father!)
John 10: 10 reads, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I (Jesus) have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
(Jesus came to show us how to overcome and have abundant life!)
Deuteronomy 20: 4 says, “For the LORD your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory."
(You are an OVERCOMER when you follow God’s leading!)
Jeremiah 29: 11 states, “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD , ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’”
(He has a plan for you and your new family – it is a plan of success!)
Hosea 4: 6 says, “My people are destroyed from lack of knowledge.”
(Our families fail for the same reason!)
Luke 3: 23 reads, “Now Jesus himself was about thirty years old when he began his ministry. He was the son, so it was thought, of Joseph…
(Jesus grew up in a stepfamily environment…Joseph is a role model for us today!)
Colossians 3: 21 (Amplified Bible) states, "Fathers, do not provoke or irritate or fret your children [do not be hard on them or harass them], lest they become discouraged and
sullen and morose and feel inferior and frustrated. [Do not break their spirit.]"
(Parents can overwhelm and overburden their children - expecting too much too soon, and cause them to pull away from them, and the family.)
Proverbs 24:3 says, "By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established."